MMM

Well..I guess this is getting a sad blog. Everytime I use it is because I am sad.

These days I have been sad cuz I think I like someone A LOT! The problem is he doesn't lives near me...In fact, he lives really far away. Why I am always getting involved with people with whom I cannot have a normal relationship? Why am I always making thinks more complicated? I am every fucking day waiting for him...EVERY FUCKING DAY! I don't have a life! I am a robot! I am a piece of shit...I could die right now and nobody would notice it :..(

Maybe I am afraid of living...of the suffering that it can bring...

I don't know, maybe it is just that I really need to be loved, understood...I need somebody to take care of me. Why can't I find the kind of boy I am looking for? What am I saying? I don't even know what I am looking for.

I want love but I keep it away from me!!

My whole life sucks right now...I cannot stand it anymore. I don't know what I am going to do..........